


You're a WHAT?

by redridingemissary



Category: Teen Wolf (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Human, Alternate Universe - No Werewolves, M/M, Misunderstandings, Porn, Porn Video
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-05-17
Updated: 2018-05-17
Packaged: 2019-05-07 23:42:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,108
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14681931
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/redridingemissary/pseuds/redridingemissary
Summary: Derek lives below Stiles, and he can hear rigorous sex going on in the bedroom above his.





	You're a WHAT?

They don’t squeak the bed, but there is always moaning, grunting, and fucking whimpering, and Derek is FED UP. It might be okay to have to hear them going at it a couple times a month, but every day!!! Who has sex three times a day?! DEREK WORKS FROM HOME. HIS OFFICE IS RIGHT BELOW IT. 

One day, it sounds like there’s an orgy going on upstairs. At the very least a threesome, and Derek is going to storm up there and kindly tell them to SHUT THE FUCK UP JESUS CHRIST! He stomps up the stairs and marches to the door. Bangs on it, so he knows they heard him. He’s a little smug to hear the moaning stop immediately. Good. Quiet footsteps and a creaking door. A face pops out. 

He’s- actually really fucking cute. Like “can I join the orgy with you” cute. Like, would enjoy taking this fight downstairs to mine, cute. And Jesus Christ, the bedhead. Suddenly, the noises make so much more sense. Derek would moan loud as shit for that. The man slowly opens the door. 

He’s- wearing plaid. And jeans. And shoes. And Derek is confused. Who gets dressed that fast after sex, just to answer the door? I mean, maybe some sweats? A sheet? He’s wearing shoes, for Christ’s sake. Who puts on shoes to answer the door, when you’re in the middle of intercourse? 

“Um, how can I help you?” He looks friendly enough, not like he just got pulled out, _literally_ , in the middle of fucking someone’s brains out. “Yeah, uh-” Derek’s nervous. Why is he nervous? “Your- um. Your friends are making a lot of noise? And I was wondering if you guys could keep it down?” Now the man looks confused. There is now a lot of confusion, all around. “My friends?” “Yeah. Your- _activities_ are a little too loud.” Derek is _trying_ to put _emphasis_ , without actually _saying_ it. Suddenly there are a lot more italics happening. 

“I’m alone? Maybe, it’s one of the other neighbors? I haven’t had any friends over in a while, actually.” He looks a little dejected about that. Derek is resisting the urge to invite himself over. He could say something smooth. Yeah, something like, ‘I could be your friend,’ or ‘Well in that case, it’s a good thing I’m here.’ Something suave. With that face he does, when he wants to get free drinks at the Jungle. 

“No, it is definitely your place. Can I come in?” 

Again he looks confused. Having a strange man ask if you have friends over, and then ask to come in when they know you’re alone, does sound a _bit_ creepy, now that Derek is thinking about it. “I just would rather have this conversation _privately_. Because of the neighbors. I wouldn’t want to um, embarrass you.” The man looks skeptical. 

Maybe if he wasn’t a stranger? “And I’m Derek by the way.” He doesn’t stick out his hand. Who _knows_ where those have been. Squinty eyes and then the door opening wider is the only response. 

He turns around and moves to the side. “I’m Stiles. And uh, sure? I guess?” Derek braces himself for anything he may or may not want to see. He hopes everyone is at least a _little_ covered up. Or in the bedroom at the very least. 

There’s no one there. Actually, there is no sound coming from anywhere else in the apartment. 

The door shuts with a click and Derek turns to face Sexy Neighb- Stiles- again. “So, what was this _conversation_ you wanted to have?” Shit. Maybe it was the neighbors. “I’m sorry, I heard a lot of moaning, and I thought you had an orgy going on up here, or something. But it must have been the neighbors.” The man flushes, “Oh, it wasn’t the neighbors. That was me. NOT _me_ , but you know, me.” Derek does not know me, me. “I’m an editor. For a company. A certain _kind_ of company.” 

Where is this going? Derek doesn’t know what’s happening now. The man braces himself and plunges on, “I edit porn videos? And I’ve been working on a few projects this week. I’m _really_ sorry if you had to hear all that through the floor.” Everything is making a lot more sense. “A porn? Company?” “Yeah, I’m an editor? I edit the videos. You know, after they shoot them?” 

Editor. Of porn videos. Porn videos. That he- edits. 

Stiles is still talking. "Yeah sorry, usually I go into the office but you can probably understand why that's a little bit distracting. I mean of course it's just distracting- but, it's you know _distracting_. How can it not be at a porn studio, you know? Unless you're asexual. Probably anybody would be distracting if- you know- that's your thing. You know, cause I'm a little too completely and utterly gay to- and I'm babbling again. Sorry, yeah I'll try to work more at the office? At least as long as I can. Finstock’s a little invested in this one. Hot under the collar. This guy has a great dick, but the girl’s a little too whiny, you know. We've been doing pretty well, so apparently that means we need to be twice as busy. To keep up with the new clientele or something. And I guess with the holiday season coming up- well the _porn_ holiday season- Valentine's Day- it's sexy to watch porn together or something. So, yeah, I've been busy. But again, I'll try to keep it down. But there's no sexing going on up here. Not that that would be bad, you know. I mean, for me. But for you probably it wouldn't be. Good. So yeah. My apologies. I'll try not to bring my work home with me. I mean the videos! Not the people, you know. Because that is definitely not been happening. Been having a dry spell. That's- I should not have told you that. But you're kind of distractingly attractive. And I haven't had time to go down to the Jungle. So I'm a little- you know- sorry, I didn't need to tell you any of this. Just stop me anytime. I am sure I am probably embarrassed enough for the both of us!”

Derek decide now is the time to be Suave. "I mean, I could take you to the Jungle. When you're not busy. At work. You know when you finish?"

Stiles is stunned silent. But his smile is blinding. “Yeah, I- yeah. Tomorrow? 9?”  
___  
Stiles promises not to show anyone the edits he does on their own naughty videos. 

Finstock is pissed.

**Author's Note:**

> If you like what you saw, please leave me a comment!


End file.
